CheekyGorilla
DO NOT BEAM Women's Relaxed T-Shirt
Nope. Not today, aliens. This tee says exactly what you’re thinking when life tries to get a little too weird. “DO NOT BEAM” is your official message to the galaxy: you’re staying grounded, unbothered, and entirely unavailable for spontaneous interplanetary travel.
Made from soft, breathable cotton with a relaxed fit that feels like a gentle hug, this shirt is your uniform for resisting drama—earthly or otherwise. Whether you're dodging UFOs or just blocking bad vibes, it's the perfect look for navigating the chaos in style.
It’s witty. It’s defiant. It’s for the woman who’d rather chill on the couch than explore Saturn’s rings with strangers. Slip it on, sip something strong, and stay proudly un-beamed.
A top-tier Earthling essential. Add it to your wardrobe before the probes start circling.
• 100% combed and ring-spun cotton
• Heather Prism Lilac & Heather Prism Natural are 99% combed and ring-spun cotton, 1% polyester
• Athletic Heather is 90% combed and ring-spun cotton, 10% polyester
• Other Heather colors are 52% combed and ring-spun cotton, 48% polyester
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz/y² (142 g/m²)
• Relaxed fit
• Pre-shrunk fabric
• Side-seamed construction
• Crew neck
Size guide
| SHIRT WIDTH (inches) | SHIRT LENGTH (inches) | US SIZES | EU SIZE | UK SIZE | SLEEVE LENGTH (inches) | |
| S | 18 ½ | 25 ¼ | 6-8 | 36-38 | 10-12 | 7 ¾ |
| M | 20 | 26 | 10-12 | 40-42 | 14-16 | 8 ¼ |
| L | 22 | 26 ¾ | 14-16 | 44-46 | 18-20 | 8 ¾ |
| XL | 24 | 27 ½ | 18-20 | 48-50 | 22-24 | 9 ½ |
| 2XL | 26 | 28 ¼ | 22-24 | 52-54 | 26-28 | 10 ¼ |
| 3XL | 28 | 29 | 26-28 | 56-58 | 30-32 | 10 ¾ |
| SHIRT WIDTH (cm) | SHIRT LENGTH (cm) | US SIZES | EU SIZE | UK SIZE | SLEEVE LENGTH (cm) | |
| S | 47 | 64.1 | 6-8 | 36-38 | 10-12 | 19.7 |
| M | 50.8 | 66 | 10-12 | 40-42 | 14-16 | 21 |
| L | 55.9 | 68 | 14-16 | 44-46 | 18-20 | 22.2 |
| XL | 61 | 69.9 | 18-20 | 48-50 | 22-24 | 24.1 |
| 2XL | 66 | 71.8 | 22-24 | 52-54 | 26-28 | 26 |
| 3XL | 71.1 | 73.7 | 26-28 | 56-58 | 30-32 | 27.3 |