CheekyGorilla
NEXT ABDUCTION DELAYED MEN'S garment-dyed heavyweight t-shirt
The "NEXT ABDUCTION DELAYED" men’s garment-dyed heavyweight t-shirt is your way of saying, “I’m still waiting for my ride off this planet.” For anyone who feels like they’re just hanging out on Earth, hoping for that call from the mothership, this tee is your perfect companion. It’s not just a shirt; it’s a cheeky nod to those moments when you wonder if there’s a better place to be—and it’s not here.
Made with heavyweight, garment-dyed fabric, this shirt is as tough as you are while you’re stuck in traffic or dodging everyday chaos. It’s built to last, comfortable enough for long days of contemplating the universe, and ready to handle whatever comes your way—whether that’s another mundane meeting or just another day of waiting for a UFO to show up.
Feeling grounded? Wear it loud and proud. Grab the "NEXT ABDUCTION DELAYED" tee now and let everyone know that, while Earth’s holding you hostage, you’re still waiting for something bigger to happen.
• 100% ring-spun cotton
• Fabric weight: 6.1 oz/yd² (206.8 g/m²)
• Garment-dyed
• Relaxed fit
• 7/8″ double-needle topstitched collar
• Twill-taped neck and shoulders for extra durability
• Double-needle armhole, sleeve, and bottom hems
Size guide
| WIDTH (inches) | LENGTH (inches) | SLEEVE CENTER BACK (inches) | |
| S | 18 ¼ | 26 ⅝ | 16 ¼ |
| M | 20 ¼ | 28 | 17 ¾ |
| L | 22 | 29 ⅜ | 19 |
| XL | 24 | 30 ¾ | 20 ½ |
| 2XL | 26 | 31 ⅝ | 21 ¾ |
| 3XL | 27 ¾ | 32 ½ | 23 ¼ |
| 4XL | 29 ¾ | 33 ½ | 24 ⅝ |
| WIDTH (cm) | LENGTH (cm) | SLEEVE CENTER BACK (cm) | |
| S | 46.4 | 67.6 | 41.3 |
| M | 51.4 | 71.1 | 45 |
| L | 55.9 | 74.6 | 48.3 |
| XL | 61 | 78.1 | 52 |
| 2XL | 66 | 80.3 | 55.3 |
| 3XL | 70.5 | 82.6 | 59 |
| 4XL | 75.6 | 85 | 62.6 |